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FAMILY: The Importance of Family Traditions

Updated: Jun 9




When Laurie and I were newly weds, we hadn’t thought much about what we were going to do on the holidays.  My mom and were divorced.  Dad lived about 45 minutes away.  My mom lived about 3 hours up north.  Laurie’s parents lived in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan about 7-8 hours away.


Trying to please all of our families was really tough.  To celebrate Christmas, we’d go to my moms for Thanksgiving. We’d try to go to Laurie’s parents for Christmas. We’d try to go to my dad’s place around the New Year’s to celebrate Christmas to try to fit them all in and keep everyone happy.


When our first daughter, Ashely came along.  We continued to try to please everyone by trying to squeeze them all in during the Thanksgiving and Christmas season while we tried to start our own holiday family traditions with our new little family.  It wasn’t going very well.  We would be exhausted by the time the holiday season was over.


We decided that we were going to protect Thanksgiving Day and Christmas Day by starting our own family traditions.  We tried to still see my mom and dad and Laurie’s parents during the holidays but we would space it out more.  We would invite them to come and join us for the holidays to try to help save us a trip.


Article by Lisa Lakey:


The following article was written by Lisa Lakey for Family Life about her struggle with trying to create her own family traditions.


“Wrapping paper was everywhere. Far too many toys scattered the floor, their packaging lying in ruins as our 1-year-old zoomed from one to the next—the effects of a sugar cookie and chocolate milk for breakfast apparent to all. My husband and I laughed with my husband’s parents, enjoying an extra cup or two of coffee before the rest of the family arrived.


But my heart just wasn’t fully in it.


Part of me loved having extended family together on Christmas morning (I’m blessed with fantastic in-laws). But a bigger, more selfish part wished we were home. Our home. By the Christmas tree we had decorated, the same one our daughter had undecorated anywhere her little hands could reach.


We had been married for four years, but this was the first Christmas I felt homesick. I missed my family and our traditions. We hadn’t opened one present on Christmas Eve the way my family did when I was a kid. We didn’t play board or card games either. There was no Christmas movie the night before, no endless reruns of A Christmas Story on the TV.


When we got married, I inherited another set of parents, a grandmother, a sister and nephew, and aunt and uncles. That was the easy part. I actually like these people. 


But what I didn’t expect was I also inherited someone else’s holiday traditions. I worried keeping my traditions meant losing his. I didn’t want that. But there were also traditions I didn’t want to sacrifice. Traditions I wanted to enjoy with our children and, one day, our grandchildren.  


After we had headed home that Christmas, my husband and I talked about what each of our expectations were for holidays. We were surprisingly on the same page with one thing: We wanted our kids home on Christmas morning.


That day changed our Lakey Family Christmas traditions. After talking it over with our parents, we decided Christmas morning was for our little family, and we would visit my family later in the day. Since my husband’s family is three hours away, we decided we would spend each Thanksgiving at their home, and celebrate Christmas with them on New Year’s.


Several years later and another kid added to the mix, I no longer feel homesick during the holidays. We established our own traditions (including a Christmas Eve scavenger hunt) and kept what we love about each other’s—a breakfast casserole and cinnamon rolls from my husband’s side, and making a big event of decorating the tree from mine.


And I’ve realized another thing (took me awhile, huh?). Wherever my little family is, is home.”


Why Family Traditions are Important:


Why are Family Traditions so important? They build security and safety for your children as well as provides long lasting memories that knit families together.


Below are a few family traditions that Laurie and I built with our family over the years.


Thanksgiving Weekend:


For Thanksgiving Day, my wife Laurie would spend the day preparing a nice dinner with family and friends in the afternoon. Of course, we would all help if we could.


The table would always be set with nice china, place mats, glasses and silverware.  The table always looked beautiful.


Of course, before the meal we’d always pray a Thanksgiving prayer thanking God for His many blessings.  Like the early pilgrims, we sometimes would go around the table and share what each family member was grateful for.


Thanksgiving Friday or Saturday, we would take our kids to the local Christmas Tree farm and pick out a Christmas tree.  My wife and kids would pick out the perfect tree and I would cut it down.  I would have the tree netted and then tied it to the top of our car The girls and Laurie would go inside for cookies and hot chocolate and I’d join them after the tree was ready for travel.  Afterwards, we would take a family picture in a wooden sleigh that sat out front of the Christmas Tree Farm.


We’d take it home and I’d put it in the stand.  My wife and children would decorate it and I would put up the Christmas lights on the outside of the house. The house would be decorated with Christmas decorations in preparations for the reason of the season.


Sunday morning we’d go to church and then enjoy the afternoon watching Detroit Lions football.


Christmas Weekend:


Every Christmas Eve, we’d a nice family dinner together.  Just like Thanksgiving, we’d set the table with our best china, placemats, silverware, glasses, etc.


That evening we’d go to the candlelight Christmas service at church.  The church was always beautiful with a Christmas tree up front and then at the end of the service, the lights would be turned down as we would sing the traditional Christmas hymns. The service would always end with Silent Night.  It was always a heartwarming time.


Christmas Day, we’d wake up to a nice family breakfast with cinnamon rolls/monkey bread and orange juice.  Then we’d sit by the tree to open our Christmas gifts. We would open one gift and then family member would open another until everyone had opened a gift and then we’d start over until all the gifts were opened. Enjoy the day with each other relaxing, watching old Christmas movies like It’s a Wonderful Life or White Christmas.


New Years Eve: 


On New Years Eve, we’d either have our neighbors and their children over or we’d go over to their house which was right next door.  We’d have lots of snacks to eat and drinks.  We’d watch football in the early afternoon. Later that evening, we’d play table games with the whole crew and have lots of fun.


At midnight, we’d watch the countdown on TV and then celebrate with some non-alcoholic champaign.  We’d give everyone a hug and wish them a ‘Happy New Year’ and headed home for bed.


Memorial Day Weekend:


On Memorial Day Weekend, we’d sometimes drive up to my mom’s place up north in the lower peninsula of Michigan.  We’d always have a cookout, and go moral mushroom hunting up in the mountains.  Mom would fry them up in the afternoon and we’d have a campfire in the evening.


Easter Weekend:


For Easter, each girl had their own Easter basket.  The night before Easter after the girls had gone to bed, we would put some goodies in their baskets and hide them around the house.  They would have to fine them on Easter Sunday.


We’d also hide plastic Easter eggs with chocolates inside them.


We always would go to the Palm Sunday Service the Sunday before Easter Sunday to celebrate the life of Jesus.  We’d go to the Good Friday Services or any other special Easter services at church during Easter weekend.  Of course, we’d always go to the Easter Sunrise Service to celebrate that the tomb was empty and that Jesus had risen.


After church on Easter Sunday, we’d make a special meal and set the table with china and make it a special meal.


The 4th of July:


On Independence Day, many years we’d drive up north to visit Laurie’s family in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. It was always a fun getaway.   


In the afternoon, we’d go a watch the parade and the kids would collect candy as it was passed out along the parade route. After the parade, we’d go down to the park and enjoy hot dogs, chips and a pop, listen to music, play at the playground or play games that were set up.


Gramma lived right across the street from the fireworks so we always had a perfect view from her garage in the evening as we would set off some of our own fireworks.


Other Family Traditions and Holidays:


We’d have many other family traditions like celebrating Valentine’s Day, we’d go camping during the summer months, celebrate birthdays and other special moments.  Ideas for forming family traditions are endless.  Have fun as you build special moments with your family that will last a lifetime.




 
 
 

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